


The Haunting of an Antique Bookshop

by HolaImOla



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: ((wow who'd have thought huh)), ???? - Freeform, Aziraphale's Bookshop (Good Omens), Banter, Crossover, Demons, Dialogue Heavy, Gen, Ghost Investigation, Haunting, Maybe - Freeform, Not Beta Read, Supernatural Shane, kinda silly, maybe Ryan's just imagining things even the author doesn't know, there isn't rly any story tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-02-07 11:04:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21457015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HolaImOla/pseuds/HolaImOla
Summary: "We got another house call-  a very worried man believes his husband's bookstore is haunted by some supernatural beings.""How thoughtful." Shane made an "aww" sound.In which Crowley one day thought "hey, wouldn't it be something if I pranked those ghost hunters for some good, harmless chaos?", and now they're actually there (also, Aziraphale doesn't seem to share Crowley's optimism about this whole situation).But let's be honest here, the bookshop in Soho isn't actually plagued by demons. It's just as normal and human as the Internet's Ghoul Boys.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Ryan Bergara & Shane Madej
Comments: 12
Kudos: 412





	The Haunting of an Antique Bookshop

**Author's Note:**

> oof, long time no post :')) semi-finals have killed me  
this is a VERY late Happy Halloween fic, so there's that  
I'd like to say that the next chapters to my other two fics on here will be out soon but school's really kicking my butt so :") I'll try though!

Ryan Bergara grinned into the camera.

"Hello, Ghouligans! In this brand new season of BuzzFeed Unsolved Supernatural we're going to different haunted places around Europe!"

"'Cause we're rich now." Shane added with a blank face, making Ryan let out a little laugh.

"We're going to be traveling from West to East- starting with the British Islands and finishing off in Poland. And, of course, in each place we're going to try to answer the question from our on-going investigation: are ghosts real?"

Shane, as usual, stared at the camera and shook his head quickly, as Ryan added: "Do you think we'll find your long-lost family in Poland? Like, are there gonna be any Bigfoots?"

"There certainly will be one once we get there." Shane laughed and pointed at himself. "But, that'll be in a few episodes. What are we doing today, Ryan?"

Ryan took his phone out from his pocked and started reading out loud from his notes.

"Today, we're visiting a bookshop in Soho, London. We got another house call- a very worried man believes his husband's bookstore is haunted by some supernatural beings."

"How thoughtful." Shane made an "aww" sound.

"And so we, the world-famous Ghoul Boys, will come and cleanse the place!"

Ryan grinned once more and went to explain the thing in more detail.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aziraphale stared at the demon sitting at the other side of the table, his hand frozen with a biscuit right by his lips. Crowley just grinned nervously behind his sunglasses and sunk deeper into the sofa.

"You... Did what?"

The demon shifted uncomfortably under Aziraphale's glare. As fun and mischievous as his idea seemed when he had first conceived it (and then immediately decided to bring it to life without a second thought), the way Aziraphale could look made him regret all of it instantaneously.

The thing was- Crowley might not have been under Hell's rule anymore, but he still didn't mind spreading a healthy dose of harmless chaos, and pranking two "ghost investigators" about demonic entities in his house seemed like the dictionary definition of said harmless chaos.

"I called them... You know what 'call' means, right?" he mumbled.

"Of course I do, that's not why I asked!" Aziraphale snapped at him angrily.

Crowley sunk even deeper into the couch.

"_Please don't be mad at me just finish your biscuit and calm down please I love you_" he muttered under his breath quickly.

The angel seemed to calm down by the slightest, and he did eat the pastry in his hand, which Crowley took as a good sign. He slowly pushed himself from the seat of the couch and decided to tell his idea again.

"Ssssso..." he could feel his tongue slipping into making a hiss out of the _s_. "I called those _ghost hunters _to check your bookshop and maybe, _maybe_, a part of your- our flat, and, you know... pull some tricks on them? Give them a good ol' scare."

Aziraphale looked as he had fully calmed down now (good), but then again, he started to seem more worried than angry (not good).

"But... why would you do that?" he asked, leaning his head sideways gently.

"Oh, you know... I kinda have to..?"

Aziraphale furrowed his eyebrows at that response.

"You do not! What about the _our side_ thing? Aren't you an independent demon-"

"No, no, angel-" Crowley cut him off. "'s not like that. It's like... compulsory. Y'know, just for my own sake."

Aziraphale shook his head and folded his arms, mumbling something about a never-ending mid-life crisis.

"Well," he started, using his _holier-than-thou_ voice "I do not enjoy the idea one bit." he quickly grabbed another biscuit and added "Besides, dear, I don't want to hurt your ego, but you really aren't _that_ scary."

Crowley gasped.

"Excussse you!" he breathed. "I'm the ssserpent from Eden!"

"I'm aware of that, but, frankly, snakes aren't even that terrifying."

"They are!"

Aziraphale smiled at him nicely, but his eyebrows were perched up, as if he was saying _"Are you sure, though?" _(he _definitely_ picked that expression up from Gabriel).

"You're not that strong either. I've seen how you struggled with those grocery bags earlier today."

"That'sss not-"

"And you turn into a crying snake when you're stressed."

"That'sss becaussse-"

"And don't even get me started in the lisp." Aziraphale, that bastard love of his life, was now visibly having fun and smirking slightly.

Crowley pouted. "'sss not a lissp. 'm a ssnake." he mumbled.

He quietly decided that all of Aziraphale's arguments were invalid, since how could _anything_ be scary to him if he was the being that turned into this weird light-thing with thousands of eyes when mad (seriously, how in _whatever_ was Crowley ever supposed to top that?).

"When are those ghost hunters coming, anyways?"

"In a week..?"

Aziraphale nodded slowly and let out a heavy breath. "Well, I better do get prepared then."

"Prepared for what?"

"Prepared for more nuisances in the bookstore than just the usual you." Maybe Crowley was imagining things, but it looked like the angel's expression softened a little.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You know, Ryan, I was wondering-" in order to get Shane's face in his camera, Ryan had to hold it in a weird angle, and it didn't help that they were walking (the footage probably wouldn't end up in the final cut of the video, but he decided to never be too sure).

They took a few days before the investigation to walk around the city- they were in London after all. Right now, though, they were nearing to Soho, with all of their equipment ready and set for the demon hunting.

"I was wondering if British demons have British accents." Shane finished his thought, glancing at the camera.

"What?" Ryan laughed.

"They would, right? I mean we talked with ghosts in other languages, 'cause they didn't speak English-"

"Ghosts and demons are different things."

Shane raised his eyebrows and shook his head. "They're both the wind, buddy. Or, like, malfunctions. Also, why would they know any English in the first place? Do they learn it at demon school?"

"Demon school?" Ryan wheezed.

"Yeah. It has young demons sitting in chairs at desks, and the teacher demon guy just like... translates English to growling. And, oh no, the one in the front is now getting detention, 'cause he got a good mark! And demons are baaad, they can't get _good_ marks on anything-"

"Okay, shut up."

"What, are you not feeling any compassion for the little demon from the front row? How could you!"

"Demons don't go to school, Shane."

Ryan stopped and glanced at the Google Maps app on his phone for the last time. "It should be around here..." he mumbled.

Sure enough, the corner of the street they were on was occupied by a building with "_A. Z. FELL AND Co_." written in gold letters above the entrance. The two approached it; Shane bent down gently and stared at the sign hanging from the door.

"Dude's got funny work schedule." he laughed gently, pointing at it.

"It is an antique shop, you know." Ryan reached his hand to the handle, but before he could do that, the door swung open.

The man inside the bookshop did not look like somebody who'd visit the place too often. He had short, fiery red hair, with a small tattoo on his temple, right below the hairline. He was dressed in all black and his eyes were hidden behind dark sunglasses. He was tall (not as tall as Shane, though) and thin, with pronounced cheekbones. He smiled gently after first glancing at both of them.

"Anthony Crowley-Fell." he said in a British accent as he shook their hands. "I'm glad to finally meet you."

"So, you're the worried husband?" Shane asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Yes, I suppose that's me." he moved to the side a bit. "Do come inside."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So, Mr. Fell, your husband believes that your bookstore and flat are haunted." said the shorter man (Ryan? Aziraphale wasn't bothered enough to remember). Aziraphale tried to not feel uncomfortable with all of the cameras pointing at them, but it was quite a hard task.

"Yes, he indeed does." he sighed and with great effort prevented himself from shooting a deadly glare at Crowley.

"And you, do you believe in the existence of anything supernatural? Like ghosts or demons?"

This time Aziraphale couldn't help but stare at the demon in the room.

"I suppose I have to." he said coldly; Crowley, that git, looked as if he was pushing back a grin.

"So, do you also think that your bookstore is being haunted?"

Aziraphale shook his head.

"Oh, I certainly do not. The worst things to appear here are loud clients." _And ghost investigators_, he added in his head. "Frankly, I've seen what Cro-Anthony gave as the 'demonic proof', but really, I'd blame most of it on aging."

The taller man laughed under his breath and Crowley's almost-grin flattened a bit.

"How could books falling after the shelves be explained by aging, though?" Ryan didn't seem to give up.

_Most of those were just made up_, Aziraphale thought.

"It's an old, big bookshop. Sometimes a shelf is just a bit loose. Sometimes a book wasn't places exactly at its' place." Aziraphale shrugged.

"So the bookshop isn't haunted?"

"No way in Hell."

"What about the flat above?"

Aziraphale shrugged his head. "The most horrible thing to enter the flat was my husband, and he's not exactly what one would call '_demonic._'"

Crowley looked somewhat hurt, but he hid it pretty well behind his neutral, blank expression.

Ryan laughed gently. "I hope our arrival didn't bring any divorce reasons.

"Oh, no," Aziraphale smiled sourly. "we're stuck with each other for too long for that."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You've gotta admit it, Ryan, the guy knows how to arrange the place." Shane said after they both wandered around the bookstore for a bit.

"Huh?" Ryan didn't exactly listen- he was more focused on the bookcase filled to the brim with books about occult and the supernatural.

"I mean, look at this place. It's so much bigger than it seems on the outside, and yet it still feels kinda cramped. I wonder how- Ouch!" he suddenly jumped on one foot and took a few steps backwards.

This finally made Ryan tear his eyes away from the creepy (yet fascinating) books. "Are you alright?"

Shane glanced at the round rug he was about to step on, and then back at Ryan again.

"Uh, um, yeah, yeah." he smiled, but it came out a bit forced. "I just... I think I just stood in a wrong way... Or I got a pebble in my shoe.

Ryan raised his eyebrows and eyed the taller man from head to toe. Then he just shrugged.

"Okay." he said dryly. "C'mon now. We've got some demons to talk to." He shook the Spirit Box in front of Shane's face.

He unceremoniously walked on the rug and didn't even glance at Shane, who carefully walked around the thing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crowley and Aziraphale decided to wait through the whole thing above the bookshop, inside the flat. After some walking around between the rooms, Aziraphale finally sat on their bed, Crowley soon did the same right next to him. The angel had his arms crossed and he didn't even bother taking out a book to read. His eyes were focused on some spot in front of him. Crowley, on the other hand didn't seem to notice the obvious clues he was being given, as he was grinning and rocking back and forth in excitement.

"They're gonna bring out their spirit-box-thingy now, I can feel it!" he exclaimed.

Aziraphale finally shifted his stare to look at him.

"I'm glad to see at least one of us is having fun right now." he said coldly.

"Shush, angel." Crowley seemed way too happy right now. "I'm gonna repay you somehow. I'll buy you crepes for the entire month."

_You already do that_, Aziraphale thought, but didn't get to saying it out; all of his thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a loud, stinging noise that pierced through his brain. He quickly put his hands to his ears, as if to stop it, but it seemed as if it wasn't coming from outside. It almost felt like his own brain was the source of the noise.

Crowley also shuddered, but he shook if off way quicker.

"Guess they started using the blessed thing." he smirked.

Aziraphale glared at him.

"If you have to talk to them, you might as well tell them to turn this knick-knack off." he grumbled angrily.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ryan held the Spirit Box in his hands at both he and Shane stared at it intensely. It made a series of familiar, choppy, _annoying_ noises- nothing out of the ordinary. Ryan just took a deep breath, glanced at Shane quickly, and began their usual ritual with the box- starting with telling their names to the whatever-this-was.

"Can you repeat our names?" Ryan asked.

After a moment of relative "silence" (it was as silent as it got with a beeping box in your hand), the voices croaked.

"R̶̠̃ỵ̴͐a̴̺̓n̶͂ͅ.̶̨̊."

"Holy shit." Ryan's eyes almost fell out of his orbits.

"Ṡ̵̤h̴͓̔a̶̰͆n̵̳̂è̶͕.̷̡̕"

Seeing how Ryan was basically losing it right now, Shane was the one to speak.

"What's your name?" he asked, putting on that _I'll-fight-every-demon-and-have-fun-doing-it_ voice.

It seemed like the Spirit Box went back to the typical sound of just switching channels, until after a moment it let out a single sound that could be interpreted as an actual word.

"F̸u̸c̴k̴."

Shane laughed out loud, and Ryan, although still quite scared, couldn't help but let out a little laugh as well.

The box almost immediately let out a sound that one could only interpret as a part of a longer sentence, said in a slightly different voice.

"..-n̷'̵t̵ ̶t̷h̸i̷n̴k̷ ̷o̷f̴ ̸n̶a̴m̸e̷,̷ ̵d̸i̸d̴ ̴y̶-.."

It was followed by something that might have been either a "Shit!" or "Shhh!".

Shane couldn't help but laugh again; Ryan, however, seemed to have only grown more scared. He slowly turned to Shane, his hands shaking, and his eyes glossy.

"T-there's two of them..." he whispered in a trembling voice.

"Yep!" Shane grinned. "And look at 'em, just having a fight right in our Spirit Box!"

"How the fuck are you not terrified right now?"

"How the fuck are _you_ terrified right now, though? C'mon," he took his hand out. "give me my flashlight, we're gonna do some alone time with the fighty guys." Ryan didn't look nearly as happy, but he eventually decided to actually go first, to _get it over with_.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the Spirit Box was turned off, the ringing noise, along with the terrible headache slowly left Crowley and Aziraphale's heads. The angel rubbed his forehead for a moment, before finally looking up to see Crowley being over the moon, staring at him with a mischievous grin.

"What?" he mumbled.

"They heard you!" Crowley said, obviously enjoying the situation way too much.

Aziraphale scoffed.

"No, they did not. You must have made up something." He replied, although he also was aware that momenst earlier his voice had gone through that damn thing. "I'm too holy for such a device to work on me."

Crowley giggled, muttered something to himself about Aziraphale keeping on telling himself that, and stood up. He headed to the door.

"Where are you going now?"

The demon turned around on his foot.

"To, oh, y'know, scare the first one? The one that's already scared?"

"So you won't try to scare the other one?"

"Eh," the demon's previous optimism seemed to have lessened a bit. "na, I don't think so. He seems a bit iffy to me." he shrugged.

Aziraphale furrowed his eyebrows.

"_Iffy_?"

Crowley shrugged again. "Dunno. Anyways-" he sneaked out of the room quietly, leaving Aziraphale all by himself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ryan was _terrified_.

Sure, there was this 'logical' voice inside his head, trying to tell him that anything that's happened so far has been their usual stuff (said voice sounded very similar to Shane's for some reason), but there was something about the antique bookshop's atmosphere that made him feel uneasy. He couldn't exactly put a finger on it, but it felt almost like his sixth sense was going: _Yo, something's not normal here_. Of course, at the moment, it was blown out of proportion, but the weird feeling had been creeping on the back of his neck ever since he crossed the threshold.

He felt it especially now, when he was there all alone. He knew that Shane was laughing at him outside, but he couldn't help it.

Something tugged on his sleeve once. Then another time. Then another.

This was Bad.

Tugging on sleeves and shirts was one of the 'standard' things he'd encountered during hauntings.

"Hello?" he shouted, not liking how much his voice trembled.

Everything seemed silent and still for a moment.

Then, the absolute worst happened- something breathed on the back of his neck.

Ryan yelped and turned around, gripping his flashlight in his hand, but, as one would have expected, there was nothing there.

With a shaking hand, he pulled up the Spirit Box and turned it on.

"Can you tell me your name?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_The tall figure was alone in the space. It was easy to sense that._

_The being turned all the electric appliances around and glanced around the room again. Still no other presence._

_"I know that you're here. And I know what you are."_

_The room remained silent and empty._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Something was definitely there." Ryan said, his eyes bouncing between staring at the camera and Shane. The other man just shook his head like he always would. Ryan was about to protest, but Shane just held his hand up to shush him.

"Only a bunch of old books, that's what it was."

"Something tugged on my shirt!"

"There are very few episodes when something _doesn't_ tug on your shirt, Ryan." Shane rolled his eyes. "I'm kinda disappointed that nothing showed up, honestly, 'cause I was really curious where do demons study English."

Ryan just groaned and mumbled something about the Shane's _dumb ideas again_.

He straightened himself and looked at the camera again, this time with a more serious expression.

"We have seen what I'd call proof for _something_ unnatural being in this antique bookshop. We didn't manage to contact with whatever that being was, though. Whether or not there was anything there, will remain... unsolved."

.

.

.

.

"You know, I really think it was actually something more than a ghost."

"Okay."

"Seriously. Like there was this evil smell in the air!"

"_Evil smell_?"

"Yeah. Like sulfur. You had to feel it too!"

"It's just _books_, Ryan. Maybe some of them were burned a bit."

"But-"

"They're inanimate objects. They can't haunt places."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crowley stared at the taller man, Shane. Shane just stared back.

He had caught him glancing at the demon every now and again, especially when the cameras weren't pointing at them. And while Crowley liked to just explain it to himself, that hey, people just stared at him sometimes, he did feel as if there was some more reasoning behind that.

He never asked Shane about that, though, obviously. It also didn't seem like Shane was the kind of person to just stare like that for some deeper reason- maybe he just happened to space out like that.

Ryan packed all of his smaller equipment and headed to the door. Before leaving he turned around once more.

"Thanks for calling and having us here." he smiled and Crowley nodded as a response. "I, uh... There's definitely something there. Maybe Shane and I scared it though." he added before finally leaving.

Shane followed him. "Yeah, see you, Mr. Crawly." he said without even turning around.

"Oh, it's Cro-" Crowley went to correct him automatically, before he realized what he had just heard.

He blinked and looked at the man walking down the street and talking with the other guy.

Crawly.

He hadn't heard that in a while.

How the _fuck_ did that random guy know that?

Shane very briefly glanced back at him, but noticing that Crowley was still standing in the doorframe, he quickly turned around.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm writing two longer Good Omens fics here so check them out maybe? c: Also I'm mostly active on instagram where I'm @/ fasbean !! :D


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